Making a Great First Impression

Getting off to a Good Start
It takes just a quick glance, maybe three seconds, for someone to evaluate you when you meet for the first time. In this short time, the other person forms an opinion about you based on your appearance, your body language, your demeanor, your mannerisms, and how you are dressed.

With every new encounter, you are evaluated and yet another person's impression of you is formed. These first impression can be nearly impossible to reverse or undo, making those first encounters extremely important, for they set the tone for all the relationships that follows.

So, whether they are in your career or social life, it's important to know how to create a good first impression. This article provides some useful tips to help you do this.

Be on Time
Someone you are meeting for the first time is not interested in your "good excuse" for running late. Plan to arrive a few minutes early. And allow flexibility for possible delays in traffic or taking a wrong turn. Arriving early is much better that arriving late, hands down, and is the first step in creating a great first impression.

Be Yourself, Be at Ease
If you are feeling uncomfortable and on edge, this can make the other person ill at ease and that's a sure way to create the wrong impression. If you are calm and confident, so the other person will feel more at ease, and so have a solid foundation for making that first impression a good one. See our section on relaxation techniques to find out how to calm that adrenaline!

Present Yourself Appropriately
Of course physical appearance matters. The person you are meeting for the first time does not know you and your appearance is usually the first clue he or she has to go on.

But it certainly does not mean you need to look like a model to create a strong and positive first impression. (Unless you are interviewing with your local model agency, of course!)

No. The key to a good impression is to present yourself appropriately.

They say a picture is worth a thousand words, and so the "picture" you first present says much about you to the person you are meeting. Is your appearance saying the right things to help create the right first impression?

Start with the way you dress. What is the appropriate dress for the meeting or occasion? In a business setting, what is the appropriate business attire? Suit, blazer, casual? And ask yourself what the person you'll be meeting is likely to wear – if your contact is in advertising or the music industry, a pinstripe business suit may not strike the right note!

For business and social meetings, appropriate dress also varies between countries and cultures, so it's something that you should pay particular attention to when in an unfamiliar setting or country. Make sure you know the traditions and norms.

And what about your grooming? Clean and tidy appearance is appropriate for most business and social occasions. A good haircut or shave. Clean and tidy clothes. Neat and tidy make up. Make sure your grooming is appropriate and helps make you feel "the part".

Appropriate dressing and grooming help make a good first impression and also help you feel "the part," and so feel more calm and confident. Add all of this up and you are well on your way to creating a good first impression.

A Word About Individuality

The good news is you can usually create a good impression without total conformity or losing your individuality. Yes, to make a good first impression you do need to "fit in" to some degree. But it all goes back to being appropriate for the situation. If in a business setting, wear appropriate business attire. If at a formal evening social event, wear appropriate evening attire. And express your individuality appropriately within that context.

A Winning Smile!
As the saying goes, "Smile and the world smiles too." So there's nothing like a smile to create a good first impression. A warm and confident smile will put both you and the other person at ease. So smiling is a winner when it comes to great first impressions. But don't go overboard with this – people who take this too far can seem insincere and smarmy, or can be seen to be "lightweights".

Be Open and Confident

When it comes to making the first impression, body language as well as appearance speaks much louder than words.

Use your body language to project appropriate confidence and self-assurance. Stand tall, smile (of course), make eye contact, greet with a firm handshake. All of this will help you project confidence and encourage both you and the other person to feel better at ease.

Almost everyone gets a little nervous when meeting someone for the first time, which can lead to nervous habits or sweaty palms. By being aware of your nervous habits, you can try to keep them in check. And controlling a nervous jitter or a nervous laugh will give you confidence and help the other person feel at ease. Again, see our section on relaxation techniques for help with this.

Small Talk Goes a Long Way

Conversations are based on verbal give and take. It may help you to prepare questions you have for the person you are meeting for the first time beforehand. Or, take a few minutes to learn something about the person you meet for the first time before you get together. For instance, does he play golf? Does she work with a local charitable foundation?


Is there anything that you know of that you have in common with the person you are meeting? If so, this can be a great way to open the conversation and to keep it flowing.
Be Positive

Your attitude shows through in everything you do. Project a positive attitude, even in the face of criticism or in the case of nervousness. Strive to learn from your meeting and to contribute appropriately, maintaining an upbeat manner and a smile.
Be Courteous and Attentive

It goes without saying that good manners and polite, attentive and courteous behavior help make a good first impression. In fact, anything less can ruin the one chance you have at making that first impression. So be on your best behavior!
One modern manner worth mentioning is "turn off your mobile phone." What first impression will you create if you are already speaking to someone other than the person you are meeting for the first time? Your new acquaintance deserves 100 percent of your attention. Anything less and you'll create a less than good first impression.

Key Points

You have just a few seconds to make a good first impression and it's almost impossible ever to change it. So it's worth giving each new encounter your best shot.
Much of what you need to do to make a good impression is common sense. But with a little extra thought and preparation, you can hone your intuitive style and make every first impression not just good but great.

Ethical Leadership

Know in advance what you'd do.
We've seen some high profile ethical failures in the press in recent years. The problems and devastation caused by accounting fraud at the investment company run by Bernard Madoff will not soon be forgotten, nor will the earlier frauds at Enron and Worldcom. People have also raised ethical questions over the welfare of some organizations' staff and suppliers.
This highlights the extent to which it can be difficult for leaders to determine what's right and wrong. Some make the wrong choices – and end up in the courts, or in the news.
What we rarely see, however, are stories about the numerous companies that are managed by ethical leaders. While standards seem to keep falling in some corporations, other leaders "raise the bar" and inspire their teams to do the same. These leaders do the right thing, at the right time, for the right reasons. They put their ethics before the bottom line – and as a result, they have dedicated teams that would do almost anything for them.
So how do they do it? And how can you do it as well? We'll show you how to define your own ethical standards – and start putting those standards into practice.

The Attitude that Guarantees Success

Would you like to get way more done with less effort and much more reward? You can, and all it takes is a little shift in your perspective and attitude.



Bear with me a moment and I will explain how to turn the stress of a “Can Do” attitude into the empowered, turbo charged curiosity of a “Might Do” attitude.

Everybody knows you should have a positive attitude.
But as is often the case, everybody may be technically correct, but not quite optimal.


Not everybody gets to the Olympics. Not everybody reaches the top of their field. If you want to be a mediocre or even good performer then listen to what everybody says and try and do it.

But if you want to be a superior performer, a super hero of sorts and a creative free spirit, common sense just doesn’t cut it. Common sense will make you common.


The other day I headed to Stone Mountain. It is just west of Atlanta and quite a tourist trap. The tourists ride a tram to the top. I hiked it. I wanted the exercise and I also wanted to earn the perspective from the top.

I wasn’t disappointed. All sweaty, with a big smile I stood on the bare, gray boulders at the top surrounded by the few Tuesday morning tourists who hadn’t earned this view.

Atlanta stretched Westward, a beautiful city and an eyeful. I wandered off the beaten trail and found a secluded lookout facing East. Woods and farmland with a few houses rewarded me for looking the direction other people were not.

I enjoyed both views and while the city view inspired me the country view resonated with a deep peacefulness within me. It made me feel calm, soft and open. I sat down and drank it in for nearly two hours, then, tired and happy I took the tram back to the base of the mountain.

Find a New Viewpoint, a Different Viewpoint

There were two men. One was tall, dark and handsome. He had a history of success. He played football in high school and had a “Can Do” attitude. His yearbook was full of comments about how successful he was certain to be.

There was another that few people noticed in high school. He was thin and had freckles. He was a “B” student and didn’t do much in the way of sports. But he had curiosity. He wondered how things work. He was endlessly asking questions and trying to make sense of how things work. If you asked him if he could do something he would answer “I might be able to.”

He was not a “Can Do” guy, he was a “Might Do” guy.

Both men were hired by a large corporation. It wasn’t long before Mr. Tall Dark and Handsome was challenged with a computer problem he couldn’t solve right away. His “Can Do” attitude crumbled.

Meanwhile the skinny little guy met difficult problems too. His “Might Do” attitude mixed with curiosity served him well. He received several quick promotions and moved up the corporate ladder. Each step he met other “Can Do” people who he left in the dust with his “Might Do” attitude.

He was a powerful force to be reckoned with. He payed close attention to everything. He listened. He learned and he adjusted and adapted.

Checking in with these two later provides an even more shocking contrast. Can you guess which one of these two was a great parent, happily married, quite wealthy and continually learning new things? And which one turned to drugs, was divorced from two very beautiful woman and remained in an entry level position at a competitor of his original job?

3 Keys to a “Might Do” Attitude

Is there anywhere in your life that a “Can Do” attitude has been holding you back? Consider stepping back and trying again with a “Might Do” attitude. Here is how to shift to the powerful “Might Do” attitude:

1. Ask yourself if there there is anything you’ve been overlooking or ignoring because it didn’t seem important?

Start with checking to see if there is anything you’ve avoided doing because it didn’t seem important. With a “Might Do” attitude minor details are sometimes the difference between succeeding and failing.

2. Step back and check to see if you are trying to prove something.

A “Might Do” attitude doesn’t feel pride or shame. A “Might Do” attitude approaches life with curiosity. It views challenges as learning experiences and not tests of its worthiness.



3. Check to see if you can break up your task into smaller steps.

A “Might do” attitude reveals that any task is composed of several steps. Each step is less difficult then the whole but requires that you complete it before moving on. Breaking up a task into smaller steps will let you approach the entire task strategically rather than the more direct approach of a “Can Do” attitude.

Success is Just a Matter of Time

With a “Might Do” attitude, you simply can’t fail. Anytime you meet a challenge, you can almost always break it up into smaller steps. Erasing the possibility of failure and ensuring your success.
Without the pressure of trying to prove something, you’re guaranteed to see those same challenges more clearly. What would you do if you could see each step to your goals with perfect clarity?

Practice a “Might Do” attitude for just a little while, and you’ll agree, it might be the perfect way to approach any challenge.